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1995-08-20
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Path: newserv.ksu.ksu.edu!moe.ksu.ksu.edu!hobbes.physics.uiowa.edu!math.ohio-state.edu!cs.utexas.edu!asuvax!asuacad!aglbn
Organization: Arizona State University
Date: Tue, 17 Aug 1993 22:38:07 MST
From: <AGLBN@ASUACAD.BITNET>
Message-ID: <93229.223807AGLBN@ASUACAD.BITNET>
Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
Subject: Plot Complications 101
Lines: 205
In the days before the "authors" listed below had the slightest
notion that the Universe was big enough to contain
alt.startrek.creative, we would have protracted discussions about
the many facets of Star Trek. These deliberations rarely resulted in
definitive answers. After all just who were you supposed to ask
about variations in Klingon cranial morphology or the relative
firepower of phasers verses photon torpedoes? What we really needed
was an introductory college course to answer basic ST:WP (Whole
Paradigm) questions. The following examination is our attempt to
fill this need. Anyone with questions (or possible answers) not
covered here is encouraged pass them along. When we get enough
background material we will compile and post ST101:The Next Exam.
Lyle Nichols (AGLBN@ASUVM.INRE.ASU.EDU)
Anthony Fodor (AUAAF@ASUVM.INRE.ASU.EDU)
John Nagy
=================================================================
Star Trek 101 March 6, 1992
Midterm Exam I
Professors: Lyle Nichols, Anthony Fodor, John Nagy
Instructions: Choose the best answer for each of the following
questions. Read all choices carefully before deciding since some
questions require sudden paradigm shifts and the instructors
don't know the answers to others.
1. Commander William Riker has slept with more alien robots then
Captain James T. Kirk (ret.).
A. True
B. False
2. What is the primary criterion for a species to be admitted
into the Federation?
A. High ethical standards.
B. A sophisticated level of technology.
C. Two thirds approval of the Federation High Counsel.
D. Fluent English.
E. Ability to hybridize with humans.
3. Why don't phasers work on crew members when they are
inhabited by alien beings?
A. Because most alien beings alter the subspace field
around their inhabited victims causing phaser beams to
decollate into harmless form.
B. Because the phaser stun effect is mostly psychological
and aliens are unaware of the expected results.
C. Because crew members are so disoriented when a fellow
officer is taken over that they subconsciously use a
lower phaser setting than required.
D. Because stunning someone and locking them in the brig
doesn't take enough time to fill an hour show.
4. Why does Captain Jean Luc Picard have a British accent
despite being born in France?
A. In the late 22nd century Great Britain conquered France.
B. Picard thinks he does have a French accent.
C. His parents were actually Armenian.
D. Patrick Stewart is from Britain and Star Trek's writers
couldn't tell the difference.
5. How many times has Lieutenant Commander Data inappropriately
assumed control of the ship?
A. 1
B. 3
C. 9
D. Data's programming would not allow him to perform such
an act.
6. How many times has Wesley Crusher saved the Enterprise?
A. Never (Wesley's a dweeb)
B. 14
C. 3 (But he's still a dweeb)
D. 97 (Face it, Wesley should be in command)
7. In a one on one contest which would win, the
U.S.S. Enterprise or the Death Star?
A. Enterprise (its a lot faster)
B. Death Star (Enterprise can't blow up planets with one
shot)
C. Since they don't exist in the same universe, such a
contest could never happen.
8. Imagine the following situation. You are in command of the
Galaxy class U.S.S. Enterprise. A Romulan Bird of Prey decloaks
dead ahead with shields up and disrupters armed and locked on to
you. When you order your tactical officer to raise shields, they
fail. Which of the following is your best course of action?
A. Have Geordie run a level 1 diagnostic on all systems.
B. Fire full phasers and a tight spread of photon torpedos
taking solace in the fact that at least Worf will get
to die in battle.
C. Send a priority 1 subspace transmission to Starfleet and
wait for further instructions.
D. Hail the Romulan ship and bluff your way through using
lots of references to galaxic understanding and
cooperation.
E. Order Riker to take command of the battle section then
separate the saucer and hang out in Ten Forward with
Guinan.
F. Try the Corbomite Maneuver and attempt to escape while
the Romulans are rolling on the floor laughing.
9. In the first encounter with the Borg the Enterprise was able
to vaporize large chunks of the Borg ship, however in subsequent
encounters only slight damage could be inflicted on the Borg.
Why?
A. The Borg learned the strengths of Star Fleet technology
and modified their ship to counter them.
B. The Enterprise was damaged and could not mount an all
out counter attack.
C. The next encounter was with a stronger Borg ship.
D. The show's writers needed more plot complications.
10. Who was Wesley Crusher's first love?
A. Ensign Gomez
B. The buxom Counselor Troi
C. The elasomorph Salia of Dalad IV
D. Klingon he-man Worf
11. Security officer Natasha Yar was killed
A. by an ugly tar monster named Armus.
B. trying to escape from Romulus with her hybrid
human/Romulan daughter.
C. by multi-armed dog creatures of Thanos VI.
D. both A & B are correct.
12. Why doesn't artificial gravity ever fail no matter how badly
the Enterprise gets hammered?
A. Artificial gravity is created by a series of extremely
reliable graviton particle generators.
B. There is actually no gravity on the ship. Everyone just
wears stealth Velcro shoes.
C. The special effects department hasn't figured out a
cheap way of producing weightlessness.
13. Why doesn't the Federation equip its starships with cloaking
devices?
A. Because it gives Starfleet's commanding officers a much
more challenging job since their ship can't just
disappear at the first hint of danger.
B. Because cloaking technology was lost when the
crystalline entity attacked and destroyed Memory Alpha
Research Library.
C. Because of the ethical problems associated with skulking
around the galaxy undetected.
D. No one knows.
14. The saucer section of the original Constitution class
U.S.S. Enterprise could separate from the drive section in the
same manner as a Galaxy class ship.
A. True
B. False
15. Phasers are more powerful than photon torpedoes.
A. True
B. False
C. It depends on the stringency of required plot
complications.
D. Not enough information
16. Who has more hair, Patrick Stewart or William Shatner?
A. Patrick Stewart
B. William Shatner
C. They have about the same amount.
17. Why didn't Klingons encountered during the original five
year mission of the Constitution class U.S.S. Enterprise have
their spinal cord wrap clear across their foreheads while all
subsequent Klingons do?
A. During the refit of the original Enterprise the Klingon
Empire had a protracted civil war which involved
nuclear weapons causing mutations.
B. In the early days of the Federation the Klingons were
very self conscious about their appearance and most had
their forehead spine removed by Klingon plastic
surgeons in order to look more human.
C. Forehead spines resulted from an allergic reaction
Klingons had to the Tribbles Scotty beamed into their
engine room during "The Trouble with Tribbles."
D. Makeup artists originally thought that big green bad
guys with slanted eyebrows were intimidating enough.
They were wrong.
18. Eating fatty foods on the Holodeck could cause...
A. significant weight loss if done regularly.
B. significant weight gain if done regularly.
C. fewer trips to the bathroom.
D. portions of a person's body to dematerialize on leaving
the Holodeck.
19. Communicators are activated by touching them lightly. How
are they turned off?
A. A second touch turns them off (most crew just forget to
do this).
B. Communicators sense neck position and turn off when the
user lowers their head.
C. The ship's main computer analyses the content of the
conversation and turns off the communicator at the
appropriate time.
D. They are never actually off. The bridge crew live
vicariously by listening in on private conversations.